Baked Bean Surprise

A man had a terrible passion for baked beans, but they always had a somewhatlively effect on him. After he met the woman of his dreams, he made the supremesacrifice and gave them up; he couldn't imagine subjecting his new wife to hisbeastly emissions.

On his birthday, his car broke down, so he called his wife and told her he'dhave to walk home. He walked past a cafe and the wonderful aroma of baked beansoverwhelmed him. Since he was still a couple of miles from home, he figured hecould indulge, and then walk off any ill effects. So he had three extra-largehelpings of beans, and he "put-putted" all the way home.

His wife met him at the door and seemed somewhat excited. She exclaimed,"Darling, I have the most wonderful surprise for you for dinnertonight!"

She blindfolded him, and led him to his chair at the head of the table,making him promise not to peek. At this point, he was beginning to feel anotherone coming on. Just as she was about to remove the blindfold, the telephone rangand she went to answer it.

While she was gone, he seized the opportunity. He shifted his weight to oneleg and let go. It was not only loud, but ripe as a rotten egg. He gasped andfelt for his napkin and fanned the air about him. He had just started to feelbetter, when another urge came on. This one sounded like a diesel enginerevving, and smelled worse. He tried flapping his arms, to clear the air. Butanother one snuck out, and the windows rattled, the dishes on the table shook,and a minute later, the flowers on the table were dead.

When he heard his wife ending her conversation, he neatly laid his napkin onhis lap and folded his hands on top of it. He was the picture of innocence whenshe walked in.

Apologizing for taking so long, she asked if he had peeked at the dinner. Heassured her he had not, so she removed the blindfold and yelled,"Surprise!!!"

To his shock and horror, there were twelve dinner guests seated around thetable for his surprise birthday party.